Kingfisher: A Small Account of the Struggle (10)

Nick & Son…Mercenary Drummers

Craig’s oscillating enthusiasm for the band allowed for strange things to be made possible. For instance, in the beginning, at the height of Craig’s involvement, he purchased from his church more than $1000 worth of musical equipment he had no real use for. Without this equipment there was no way the band would have formed.

Another strange thing happened when Craig introduced us to Nick. Somehow through his levels of networking involved in his wedding video business, Craig was given the information for Nick, a Mercenary Drummer. Craig called Nick and learned that he was a working drummer playing in several bands gigging several nights a week.

Nick was a working drummer, but we learned early on that he was not interested in joining a band. He wanted to play paying gigs anytime he could. He was not interested in the journey. He wanted the quickest dollar he could find. I attribute much of this attitude to his age. Nick was much older that the rest of this and he was no stranger to the game. He’d been in bands before, and most likely devoted much of his time to projects that failed or produced no income. He’d seen the struggle and wanted nothing to do with it. He preferred an easy $100 and a night spent playing blues and country music in a dirty bar somewhere…any bar that would let him play. For this, I respected Nick.

Craig contacted Nick, and in an effort to set up an audition, discussed the possibility of meet Nick at A Step Up Lounge, the dive Nick drummed for the house band on Saturday nights. Nick claimed to know the owner very well; well enough to arrange a small set for the band. Nick asked for a list of songs we played, which Craig produced verbally. Nick said the songs would pose no problem for him. Thus our first gig was formed. The only problem was that this gig was in fact more of an audition.

A couple of things happened after Craig informed us of our first gig. We scheduled an extra practice to go over our first set which included: Midnight Special, Desperado (Jazz Version), Roadhouse Blues, Ain’t No Sunshine, Mr. Brightside. However, the week of the gig Craig received a call from another drummer wishing to audition. His name was Derek. We held a meeting to decide what strategic approach would be taken toward Derek and Nick. We worried that by keeping our distance from one or the other, we might lose out on the best possible fit for our band. This made for an exciting week for the band. We had a drummer audition on Tuesday, an extra practice to finalize our set list, and the band’s first ever gig (even though it was really only an audition.

Kingfisher: A Small Account of the Struggle (9)

Moving At A Standstill

We continued to practice twice a week, though honestly the practices strayed from the type of environment where positive work could accomplished. Instead, we drank vodka, listened to music, and discussed the ifs of being a working band. Practice became a social gathering.

And that is when Craig stopped showing up. Instead of pressuring his home life and work life over a social gathering, he used the time to make Jenn happy, which is to say to make his life easier. He felt his participation in our gatherings did nothing to help us. That is where he was wrong. As the situation developed and festered, we needed someone to take charge, to keep us focused on moving forward. We needed someone the others could follow. We needed someone stronger than me.

What we needed was someone to find us a drummer.

28) Darkness...More Bathroom Humor

This story just happened and is slightly embarassing. And definitely not a good predicament to be in.

I had to use the bathroom. #2. I went to the normal bathroom to discover it was occupied. We have an upstairs counterpart that was also occupied. That left me with one final and rarely used option...the executive bathrooms. They are so named because they are upstairs at the back of the building next to the GM of the station, a corporate VP and the head of our accounting department.

I locked myself in and preceded to do my business when I heard several doors closing just outside the bathroom. Suddenly the light went out. I thought this might be a prank so I waited patiently for a moment. I did not hear anyone outside snickering and the light did not come back on. I reached for my phone to use as a light source and discovered it was not in my pocket. I'd left it on my desk.

Darkness. I took a deep breath and weighed my options. I did not have many. I could either finish and clean myself in the dark, or I could pinch and find a light switch immediately. Neither sounded good to me. Despite the claustrophobia of darkness, I chose to finish.

Just as a side note: There are not many things stranger than pooping in the dark.

Anyway, I finished and cleaned myself the best I could without seeing what I was cleaning. I think I erred on the side of caution because my culo is a bit raw as I type this out. So, I finished and quickly searched the walls for a switch. I flailed in the dark like a blind person and enjoyed no success. I opened the door into another room of darkness, the hall that housed the entrance into the two bathrooms. I searched the walls for another switch and came up empty once again. I went out the second door and found light for the first time in three or four minutes.

On the wall were several light switches. I turned them all on and returned to the bathroom so that I could immediately check my cleaning job. Thankfully, I did a good job. I flushed, and there was a moment when I was not sure whether the toilet would flush cleanly because of the amount of TP I'd used. Thankfully, it went down.

All of this happened because the head of accounting closed the executive bathrooms down a little early without checking to see if the bathrooms were being used. Even though there was a moment of panic, and a few moments of blind wiping, I left the situation with nothing more than a raw culo, and the understanding not to use the executive bathrooms around 5 pm.